To close to home....

Its been a little while since I last updated here. I haven`t gone anywhere. Its just been a crazy week filled with some complex emotions. I lost a really good friend a couple months ago. He was hunting and got hit by lightning while sleeping in his tent. It was tragic.

I got word last week another dear and precious friend has cancer. This is a very big shocker for me. I grew up with her and she has always been a very big part of my life. A very important part of my life. It appears she has some cancer around a major artery. Its impossible to operate and it looks like all treatment has had not effect. She is very sick just from the treatment. Last week the doctors and specialists told her she had maybe 8 to 15 months to live. It tore a hole in my heart. I am kind of in a situation where I really want to go home now. She is very close to my family so they are with her almost daily. But its tough. There is a saying that when one person has cancer the whole family gets cancer. I think I can understand this now. Its getting very tough on everyone. So its just really a hard time right now for me. I haven`t had the energy to do much. I am going to work and basically just hanging in there from day to day. No motivation. I am not sure what my motivation would be right now. To be honest anyone who knows me knows I have had some serious bad luck in the past with a few things in life. The last few years have been really good. But life is like a roller coaster. It goes up and down and the ride ends too quick. One thing is that I have been really close to my parents especially as of late. So this has been a blessing in my life I am so thankful for. Anyway, don`t want to get too deep here. Just opening up a little. But that is as far as it goes.....

Well the holidays are around the corner. I really want to go back to the US now but won`t. I will stay here and go up to Hokkaido and try to relax and forget some things. Life is tough I guess but life it life. Everyone has a drama. Anyway all in all I am doing good and have really enjoyed the fall weather in Japan. Really beautiful!!